I am gay and 40 and I am going to Thailand for a few months. I have never been to Thailand before ...?

... as we all know the gay scene in the west can be quite diecriminatory to men over 40. Someone said to me that gay Thai men actually like guys over 40 and that it isn't an 'issue' over there. Is this true. I am quite young for my age (40) but even so, many of us in the USA feel over-the-hill and overlooked by a USA gay scene that is very competitive and discriminatory. I have just eneded a very long term relationship and hate to feel I may be on the shelf. I have retired early and may even be able to retire to Thailand. Will I have a chance at new love in Thailand as a reasonably good looking 40+ year old? I have read this 'don't fall in love with a Thai' advice so many times! Are they that adorable? It's obviously a problem that many westerners fall head over heels with Thai men and women! What is the reason for this? I have read this 'don't fall in love with a Thai' advice so many times! Are they that adorable? It's obviously a problem that many westerners fall head over heels with Thai men and women! What is the reason for this?

Public Comments

1. There are places where gay men pick up gay Thais but it is almost always on a "cash" basis! Just like with straight men - don't fall in love with some Thai person and after you leave for home you send lots of money to that person. Most likely there will be other "customers/friends" sending money too! Thai women like older men because they usually have retirement pensions or have established some sort of work record that may benefit them. Probably the same for gays too - but I wouldn't have any first hand knowledge on that. * To answer your question a little. I guess when men or women are at a low point in their lives, like break ups or deaths of spouses or just lonely they may be a little more easily persuaded that this "person" saying I love you and will wait for you is actually telling the truth! But, it is a business for many people, a way to support the family and or children, a way to be put in a better position in life! Men and women alike end up sending money back to their "one and only" loves back in Thailand. Problem is that they may just be one more in line sending money!
2. my mom said that 75% of the good looking and nice THAI men are gay. so you have a good chance in thailand!! but i think lots of them are transvestites(not sure how to spell that) GOOD LUCK! AND HAVE FUN! AND FIND LOVE!
3. You will have no problems here with discrimination people here will accept you for who you are. I hope you do understand the visa requirements for long stay here in Thailand. p.s. Great job Goong you said what I was thinking, this guy is like a yoyo says one thing one time and other thing another time. As for retiring here doesn't matter if your 40 or 48 you need to be 50 to retire here. I see you had Goong answer deleted because she caught you in a lie. For me I don't worry about you deleting my answer, it isn't the first time and it will not be the last. This has nothing to do with you being HIV + or not, it has to do with the truth.
4. They will try to scam u out of your money just like the women scam the straight men.... edit: IF U R HIV+ THEN DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT GOING TO THAILAND!!!
5. gay in Thailand is same as other places in the world..... don't fall in love anyone so quick... get to know each other and learn each other as much as you can... and make sure they wouldn't cheat you.... try get to know him for a year (at least) without giving him any money or visa ( visa for him to go U.S.A.) if he still have only you... then pick him!!!! .... actually this message is not only for gay but also normal guy who is looking for Thai girl too... that 's all I can advice all of you........ http://www.discovery-thailand.com
6. The Thai people are non-judgmental and non-confrontational, there are so many gay Thai men in Thailand it's really unbelievable. I don't think you will have any problems there, being that 40 years old is a young man in Thailand. Being straight myself I don't have any experience with the Thai men. But I can tell you the Thai women are the best on the planet in my opinion. They are beautiful, intelligent and feminine. There are bad people everywhere, but most Thai women are not smug, arrogant and bitchy like SOME western women. They also know how to act like a lady, and they get treated right, imagine that!!!! They also don't have to dress like a whore to look sexy. They are the total package, it would be a dream come true to find something like that in the US. I think that's why so many foreign guys fall for the Thai women. Most have never experienced a woman like that before, that didn't think she was the center of the universe! As far as retirement, You really couldn't ask for more!! Exchange rate, awesome food and healthy, beautiful beaches and islands, genuinely polite and friendly locals. My advise to you is to not rush into anything, take some time to get to know the culture. Culture is very important to the Thai people. They don't like loud obnoxious people, take the time to learn, you almost have to deprogram yourself, lol.
7. You might want to consider Europe instead.
8. If you really are HIV+ I hope your going to inform any partners you get involved with here.
9. you be happy there...like.....born free......
10. I read a previous post from you where you stated that you were 48 years old and HIV positive. You were concerned about bringing HIV meds into Thailand because you thought they might deny you entry. You also stated that you were celibate and not going to Thailand for - and I quote - "anything naughty." The question has since been removed. Was that you or do I have the wrong person? Just curious. There seems to be some discrepancies between the two posts. Just wanted to give you a chance to clear them up.
11. Many people do warn westerners not to fall in love with a Thai, and I think this rule applies to any country where you visit for a short time. My advice is that if you want the love of a younger man (WHATEVER COUNTRY), you should realise that his first priority might be the fiancial stability and support which you can offer. Bear this in mind when you 'fall in love'. The majority of Thailand is Buddhist and I experienced a culture of live and let live. Whether you are gay or straight, you will be welcomed with open arms and the beauty and charm of the Thai people is well known. As a 45 year old gay man, I met the most interesting people and whenever I went to a club or bar, always could find someone for a chat or company or whatever you are looking for. I do not know whether Thai gays 'prefer' men over 40, but unlike most western countries they would not mind associating with you, showing you around, going out with you and charming your pants off - literally. Unlike you I am not 'reasonably good looking', but that did not for one moment prevent me from meeting the most incredibly handsome guys. We (as westerners) owe these gracious host all our consideration, so that they will always welcome us and treat us the way they do. AIDS is a problem in Thailand (like anywhere else), so if you intend getting involved with anyone; treat them with care and respect. There are many websites where you can go and have a look at what you can expect. Drop me an email if you want the links.